As I've said before, I regularly contemplate beauty and the role it plays in our lives - how it's perceived, how it's strived for, how it's abused, how it's used for good, and how God reveals himself in it.
This morning, the Today show featured a book titled "Ugly as Sin" which is based on a research project that asked women about when they felt ugly. The results were pretty depressing, with most women feeling ugly most of the time. I didn't catch every word of the interview because I was getting ready for work. But, I did catch that the author told her daughters that yes, they were beautiful - but that was just luck so how were they going to prove themselves to the world?
I am conflicted by this statement. For one, I think it's pretty harsh. On the other hand, I agree that physical beauty is fleeting and resting on it in your youth sets you up to fail later in life. However, I also think beauty comes with its own responsibilities, burdens, and blessings and that its role should not be ignored.
I do not know where the balance is for these two sides. When I was younger, I was so determined to prove myself all the time, particularly in school, and felt that beauty and feminity should be put in a box to the side and left out of the picture. I had seen it abused far too often. Since I didn't really know how to talk to boys without talking about sports or punching them, and since talking sports is all they wanted to do with me, this seemed to work well and not be a problem. In my twenties I realized that I really was a girly girl (everybody else already knew this) and that I better hurry up and be one while I still had a chance to enjoy it to its fullest. I realized I wanted to feel pretty and that wearing makeup and pink dangly earrings were independent of my test grades. Also, every woman inherently possesses beauty, but it's also a gift we're given to operate in and it would be wrong to miss that.
This is yet another area that requires balance. It reminds me of one guy that used to get mad that I didn't hike the girls up a bit more and get a lower neckline and a higher skirt line and use that to my full advantage because I could and because I had that power to manipulate so I oughta be taking advantage of it. If you know me at all you know that me and this guy didn't agree on that too much. Did I need to stop dressing like a mawmaw? Yes, I did. Did I need to become a hoochie? No, I did not.
These are some of the things that run through my mind when I see the young girls at church in their club wear. First, I think how sad that our culture has told these girls that club wear is what you wear to feel pretty and that it's perfectly appropriate for all situations. Then, I wonder where these girls fall on all of these spectrums. Are they dressed like that because they feel pretty or because they feel ugly? Are they dressed like that to feel empowered, to manipulate, or to compete with all the other girls wanting to be noticed for at least one minute in a day? And I'm not going to lie, for a brief moment I look at myself in my over 30 frumpy childcare worker gear and wonder how am I to get my own notice in a sea of church hot pants and implants.(Thankfully, this moment is brief because God's love hits me upside the head and knocks some sense back).
I feel like I've already written this post about a hundred times, but it's what was on my mind this morning. So, if you read it, thank you :).
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