Getting Schooled on Hope

I know I sound like a broken record, but the past year beat me up a bit.  Then August beat me up a lot.  Perhaps I should instead say August stretched me a lot - like taffy pull stretched.  Maybe that is my new vision for myself - you've got to be completely contorted and reshaped to make it into the final product that folks can't leave Gatlinburg without (aka - your true self/purpose).  And if the stretching wasn't an abnormal and funny-looking process, then nobody would be crowded around the Ole Smoky Candy Kitchen window to watch it. (Ok, sadly that really just came to me and that's how my brain works so I'm sorry if my taffy analogy weirds you out). 

The beating of the year had left me feeling mighty dull and low on hope.  I was very much in a place of "Really?  Is this what life is like for the rest of my time here?  Is this what I should get used to and replay over and over for the next 50 or 60  years?"  First of all, I knew these thoughts didn't sound like me.  I knew they didn't line up with my view of the world and life or with God's promises, but I sure was there thinking them.

Then, a series of events (that, in retrospect, had been going on for months) led me to buy the book One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  For those of you that are over my recent lauding of her and this book - please don't be concerned.  I'm not planning to shave my head and go stalk her or start a cult around it like folks did for that weird angel book several years back.  I'm just grateful that God used these writings to reveal more of Himself to me right when I needed it.

One of the first lessons waiting for me was from the following scripture:
I have learned how to be content with whatever I have.  I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything.  I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether itis with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little."  Philippians 4:11-12

Until recently, I had never noticed the word "learn" in this scripture.  I guess I thought Paul magically had this skill because he was Paul and in the Bible and stuff.  When I was in high school, I used to ponder the joys of getting to spend my whole life as a Christian on a journey of faith and how that journey was already written on a treasure map of sorts that only God could see.  Only He knew where I'd start and what path I would take to get to the X that marks the spot.  Now, I am beginning to understand that I will learn how to live a life that gets me to that X with hope and gratitude.

Then, God sent this scripture along through my pastor:
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.  Psalm 139: 23-24 NIV

I had never noticed the "lead me" part.  Which, to me, was further proof that this is something that God teaches us along the way.  It was a realization of "Oh, I am here in this life place and I know there is an everlasting, and I don't know how to get there with hope, but the next step is to know God will show me."

Very long story short - I'm learning hope and joy. 
And sometimes you have to go through this:

to get to this:

Images from:
http://www.andthevalleyshook.com/2010/9/10/1680521/lsu-vanderbilt-what-to-watch-for
and
http://snackattackblog.blogspot.com/2007/05/smoky-mountain-taffy-logs.html