This has been one of those weekends and mornings when I've felt so needy and so pity-party and so annoying. I go through this fairly regularly in different variations, as you might have noticed. It' s a long running-theme of desperately needing grace but not really wanting it because of reasons like: surely God is tired of me by now, I don't want to be weak, how do people stand me like this and how can I be fun at parties?, and why don't I have this all figured out on my own yet?
Then, of course, I remember that each moment is an opportunity for grace and that is a gift. Oh - and to think I don't need God's daily help and a community of others kind of goes against everything I believe. And not to be ignored, how stinking amazing is it that God's mercies are new every morning and we get to take them back up every single day. The give and take of vulnerability and need that occurs in order to turn around and be brave and courageous and boldly loved is pretty much what our time on this spinning globe is about.
I'm not in a dark place or a stuck place today, though I have known those. I'm just in a needing to be reminded place this morning.
While I was contemplating all of this, I came across a blog post on it. Of course. Because that always seems to happen. While I'm not fully where this post is - it's exactly where I was this time last year. It's a good read, no matter where you are.
Lysa TerKeurst - I Want to Run Away
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